Lessons Learned Through Sports and Competition

My kiddos have been part of a swim team since 2011. When we first joined, our only objective was a physical activity for good health and fitness. Swimming has since become a major part of our lives.

Personally, I did not have a preference for what sport they chose. Over the years, we’ve tried BMX, dance, skiing, and Taekwondo. We also occasionally take part in trail runs. Yet swimming is the sport that we’ve stuck with the longest.

I haven’t written extensively about our swim team experiences, but here’s a fun peak at her first swim meet.

High School Swim

This past winter, my daughter has been swimming on the high school swim team in addition to our year-round swim club. There is an increased level of intensity – she is required to attend 5 or more practices each week to compete in the swim meets. In club, though we aimed for 3-4 practices a week, there was no penalty if we missed or were unable to attend.

As such, she has had less free time and has thereby had to learn how to better manage her time. Yet, high school swimming has been a great experience for many reasons. My daughter says,

I like high school swim because it feels more like a family. We cheer for each other through the whole meet and we have lots of fun socials like Kozy Pie Night.

lessons learned through sports

Though hubby and I both grew up here and also began our professional careers here after college, we have only recently moved back. Her participation in high school swim has helped us to feel more connected to the community.

Lessons Learned Through Sports

Whether it is club sports or a high school team, taking part in sports has been very beneficial and we’ve recently reflected on what we’ve learned over the years.

Some days, at the end of our lessons and errands, my kids will say they are “too tired” to go to swim team but they go anyway.

There are those moments when they have been so tired they want to quit but don’t.

How to Avoid Child Burnout @EvaVarga.net

Young athletes are capable of getting burned out, too. Here’s a post exploring How to Avoid Child Burnout

They learn to be disciplined, focused and dedicated.

They learn to take care of their body. To get enough rest and to fuel their bodies with the right foods.

They learn to take care of their equipment.

They learn to manage their time and not procrastinate in completing their coursework and household chores.

They learn to work with others and to be good team mates, gracious in defeat and humble in success.

They learn to deal with disappointment when they don’t get that placing or time they’d hoped for, but still they go back week after week giving it their best shot.

They learn to make and accomplish goals. We meet with their coach periodically each season to discuss their goals and what areas they need to focus on.

They learn to respect, not only themselves, but other athletes, officials and coaches.

They learn that it takes hours and hours, years and years of hard work and practice to create a champion and that success does not happen overnight.

Sports Scholarship?

Did you know only 2% of high school athletes receive college scholarships? Chasing a Sports Scholarship may not be your best route to college.

They learn to be proud of small achievements and to work towards long term goals.

They develop life-long friendships and create lifelong memories.

Being active gets their heart pumping and their blood circulating which promotes good health and life-long habits.

They develop attributes that will serve them well throughout their lives and give them the opportunity to bless the lives of others.

I Am NOT a Soccer Mom (or How to Avoid Child Burnout)

Since we moved to California in August of 2011, my kids have participated in year-round swim team. It has been a wonderful experience. We’ve connected with other families and developed life-long friendships. We’ve also learned many life lessons along the way – but that is fodder for another post.

Today, I would like to focus on burnout. Most of us are familiar with feeling burned out. What you might not know is that young athletes are capable of getting burned out, too.

How to Avoid Child Burnout @EvaVarga.netMy daughter had always LOVED swimming! She eagerly attended practice and always worked hard. My son had been more of a roller coaster, initially complaining and dragging his feet, then going without protest, and then complaining once again.

We had a break over the winter holiday a few months ago and when we tried to resume our regular schedule in January, my son was vehemently opposed (more so than before). Much to our surprise, my daughter had also voiced her desire to stop swimming as well.

I was shocked. I had never considered myself a “soccer mom”. I had observed parents frantically running their child from one sports practice to another. I had witnessed parents screaming at their child, “Hurry up and get changed! You’ll have to eat dinner in the car. We have to get you across town for soccer!” I had heard them lament about the cost of hotels and fuel required to attend swim meets in Sacramento.

This was not us. We only did one sport. We took frequent breaks for family vacations aboard or weekend getaways to visit grandparents. We had never pushed them to compete.

We have had the opportunity to attend practice up to 6 days a week. However, we go to practice only 3x/week on the average. While competition is a part of our experience, we only occasionally compete in a swim meet (one in winter and two-three in summer) and only if the kids are interested.

How was I now dealing with child burnout?

Give it Up or Plow Forward?

We (their father and I) had always insisted the kids need to take part in a sport for exercise and general health / fitness. Yet they didn’t have an interest in another team sport. They both had expressed willingness to cycle / run with me as well as try parkour, resistance training, and/or aerobics, however.

We had invested so much time and energy into swimming. I felt compelled to continue. It had become a constant fight and major energy drain for me, however. When my daughter gave up Taekwondo years ago, I was really sad. Just as I was when she gave up dance for TKD (her brother was just a toddler then). Perhaps it was my hang up?

notsoccermom1Confer with Others

We had several family meetings discussing the issue trying to determine the root cause of the sudden disinterest. I even posted my frustration on Facebook and elicited help from my readers as well as friends and family. Here is a small snapshot of the responses I received:

  • I think it is important for the kid to want to participate and have fun doing so. If it is just a chore they are likely to only put in the very minimal amount of effort required. Not to mention that but it could just give them a general distaste for physical activity in general. I agree with requiring them to find an alternate form of physical activity. Perhaps if they really want to cycle or run with you try that. Just ensure that they understand that if the don’t maintain the commitment to running or cycling with you that you expect them to find a different activity
  • I’ve seen far too many articles about kids who specialize and their burnout levels and injury levels. I’d much rather have a child who had a high activity level all throughout life in a variety of things unless they clearly gained a deep desire for a particular sport. Honestly, it’s much nicer to have that variety. It gives them a better love for life, a higher fitness level (because of the variety of muscles used).
  • The experience, skill, coordination, fitness level … all will not be lost. As a former competitive coach, I highly recommend letting them switch. I don’t feel kids needs to arrive at a high level in any sport at all. Rather, they merely need to be active.
  • Remember the reason you’ve all chosen this path? Are you willing to trust your children to take control, be responsible for their lives. Have you thought of why so many traditional-raised/educated school kids are viewed as disrespectful, out-of-control, unacceptably acted out in adult’s view? They don’t get to choose most of the time what they do. They lack “control” of their lives–no matter what age they are. Their voices are not heard. Their opinions don’t count. They lack respect from most adults in their lives.

Talk with Your Coach

At this same time, we also had a long talk with coach. He shared that at this age – as qualifying times begin to get harder and as kids have access to other sports through their schools – it is common that kids lose interest in swimming. He also stated that one of the biggest motivators is taking part in swim meets and really looking at your progress as an individual. As we don’t compete as regularly as most, we don’t have those little goals and milestones to celebrate.

Additionally, their skills and endurance have improved a great deal over the years and they’ve been swimming with the advanced group since September. Practice is longer and more intense. Coach thereby suggested allowing the kids to choose what practice time they wanted to attend – perhaps even swimming a couple times a week with the advanced group and a couple times with the intermediate group.

I took to heart the advice and experience that was shared with me and it really helped to open a dialogue with the kids. What we discovered really surprised us.

notsoccermom2

Really Listen to Your Child

My daughter was not interested in moving back to the intermediate level but she missed her friends. Those she most enjoyed swimming with were not attending the advanced group practice. Some were no longer swimming at all. My son shared that the advanced group was just too much for him. He stated that he would continue swimming if he could return to the intermediate level.

As the intermediate level practice and advanced level practice were at different times, I had been pushing my son to swim with the advanced group so that we wouldn’t have to be at the pool all evening. Though he was quite capable of swimming at the advanced level, he too, preferred swimming with his friends and “having fun” during practice.

Our team had also experienced a number of seasoned swimmers leaving the sport that winter season for a variety of reasons. We were in essence rebuilding and the kids agreed that it just didn’t have the same “feeling”.

Find a Compromise

Talking it over as a family and really listening to what the kids had to say was the key to finding a solution. As parents, we had to be willing to let them walk away and try something new. The kids realized that they couldn’t just veg out all day. Physical activity was equally important as academics and family bonding. We thereby compromised.

They agreed that they both wanted to continue swimming. Geneva wanted to stick with the advanced group. After talking with coach, she was inspired to take part in more swim meets and asked us to assure we could make this happen.

Jeffrey wanted to return to the intermediate group. He agreed he would occasionally swim with the advanced group if we had a schedule conflict (a couple times a month).

Because I was willing to listen and find a compromise, the kids are still swimming. Their enthusiasm for the sport has returned. When the summer season began in May, they both returned to the advanced swim group.

 

 

Our Summer Plans for 2015

Summer is upon us and I am delighted. I have been battling with a growing feeling of burden upon me. I can’t seem to shake the desire to just drop everything and run into the hills.

My husband says I do too much, that my burdens are self imposed. I know he is right yet the eager beaver within me has a hard time letting go.

As obligations have begun to fall aside with the changing season, we have been giving thought to our summer plans. Vowing to relax and enjoy the sunshine a little more, we’ve settled upon the following activities.

More Art Journaling

Over the past year we have begun to dabble a little with art journaling, incorporating it into literature circle. It has been a fabulous way to express ourselves, combining art and words. We have begun to explore new media, mixing paints and printed papers to create unique art pieces.

Celebrate Summer: Mixed Media Workshop
We are looking forward to celebrating the delights of summertime by turning them into beautiful art under the tutelage of Alisha Gratehouse. Alisha offers a wonderful e-course, Celebrate Summer: Mixed Media Workshop. These projects are not your typical “summer camp” crafts. Each is a unique work of art to encourage your child to explore his or her creative talents.

Heritage Camp

The kids attended the Sons of Norway Heritage Camp last year for the first time and had an absolute blast! They have been looking forward to returning again this year and have been working hard to earn money to help offset the cost of the camp.

heritagecamp1Classes will again include Rosemaling, folk dancing, heritage, crafts, and Norwegian language. This year campers will learn money management with bank books, Norwegian Krone, a daily kanteen for purchasing special treats, and much more authentic Norwegian food at mealtimes.

Junior Olympics Swim Meet

The kids have been a part of swim team since we first moved to California. As is typical, JOs conflicts with heritage camp on the calendar. I thereby gave the kids the choice, “JOs or camp? You can’t do both.”

Last year, they were both in new age divisions and while they improved their individual times, only one qualified for JOs. After a short discussion, they agreed they would rather go to the meet with both competing. They were also eager to experience heritage camp.

junior olympics teamThis year they’ve both qualified in numerous events and their coach is encouraging them to compete. As we expected, camp and JOs conflict once again. Fortunately, camp is only 40 miles away (as opposed to 170 miles as in 2014). We thereby plan to do both – albeit they will miss a day or two of camp.

Lake Days & Sailing

Last year we had the opportunity to take part in a wonderful sailing clinic. The kids loved it so much they have asked to become a member of the local yacht club so that we can utilize the sunfish sailboats all summer long.

sailing101Whether we pursue that option or not, I am not sure. I do know, however, that we will be getting out to the lake more regularly. The kids also want to camp more – so my plan is to pitch a tent a few evenings each month.

Training

I’ve also come to discover that I need to resume training – for both my physical and mental health. I know myself well enough to also know I need a little carrot to keep me on target with my fitness goals.

moonshine

I have thereby registered for a full marathon in late August. It will be my fourth – but I am building from scratch. I must focus on quality of my runs as well as build endurance and distance. I can’t let myself worry about speed – which was my Achilles heel years ago.

As before, Geneva has expressed interest in also running distance events. We will be running the Moonshine Trail Run again this year (in 2013 I did the 15K and she the 5K). I am excited to run it with her .. her pace, if I can keep up. :)

Art, Swimming, and Dué – Collage Friday

We have had a great week .. so many memories were built this week. Our usual lessons proceeded and the days surrounding each were filled with a variety of extra-curricular endeavors.

Sweetie @ AGO swim meetWe took part in a swim meet – our last for 2013.

Both kids did very well – improving on most all of their swims.

Buddy @ AGO swim meet

We took part in our third homeschool art show (which I happen to coordinate). Buddy’s Lego Minecraft entry was voted the 2nd place favorite amongst the youngers.

Homeschool Art Show

We created poppy themed art in honor of Veteran’s Day. We shared this craft with the kids at the art show and everyone made a small thank you card for the Veteran’s home which we delivered later that day.

At Barnesklubb, we learned how to create the traditional Finnish handcraft called Himmeli.

Veteran's Day Poppy Art Activity

We brought home a new friend … a Bearded Dragon (my second).  I just loved his colors – amber, light green, and variegated browns.  We named him Dué (meaning too or also in Italian).

Bearded Dragon - our new pet

At the lodge meeting, we gave a multimedia presentation on our recent holiday in China.  It was our turn to bring the refreshments so we brought snacks common in China (e.g. sesame cookies, rice cakes, lychee fruit, and moon cakes).

The kids attended a Minecraft MakerBot 3D Printing class.  I will share more about this fabulous class soon.

 

Homegrown Learners

 

 

Ice-Breaker Swim Meet

Sweetie took part in her first sanctioned swim meet this past week in Sacramento.  As she hadn’t competed in the past, her goal was simply to complete each event, do her best, and to ultimately have fun.  Though she could have squeezed in numerous events, we chose to keep it to a minimum and she thereby chose three:  100y Freestyle, 100y Breaststroke, and 100y Individual Medley.

Warmup – Free

The weather could not have been better for mid-February.  This event last year we were told was miserably cold for the spectators … let alone the swimmers.   Her first two events were scheduled for Sat and her final event was on Sun.

100y Breast

The 100y Free provided a huge learning curve – starting off the block and a horn, rather than a whistle or someone yelling, ‘Go!’  She thereby had a delayed start but otherwise she looked strong.

100y Breast
Her favorite stroke is Breaststroke and it is also the easiest stroke to photograph.  She did much better in this event and while competing against the same girls, she place significantly higher.  It will be fun to watch how much she improves as she gains both skill and confidence.   
Start of 100y IM

The morning of the IM, she didn’t want to participate.  She started to get really nervous and nearly made herself sick with worry.  We all encouraged her to see it through and thankfully she did.  I knew she would be disappointed with herself had she backed out.  She did well and was indeed happy that she completed all her events.

The best part of the weekend – on top of meeting many of the other families and getting to know our team mates better – was that Buddy was inspired to compete as well.  I think swimming will become a major part of our lives moving forward.